21:01 - 05.03.07
Fifth dimension
You may have noticed, dear diary, that I spend a lot of time researching social, scientific and political issues before I take a stand on them. That is simply because of what I know about myself. I'm quite gullible/naive - or innocent as one of my kind friends says - so I try to find out as much as I can from several different sources that would have reason to reflect a variety of perspectives and analyses. The problem with personal relationships is that, short of hiring a private detective or background analyst, one is stuck with one's own intuitive and analytical faculties when it comes to assessing the honesty or otherwise of people one deals with on a daily basis - friends, family, co-workers and acquaintances. I choose not to listen to community comment because it is rife with dis and mis information and with speculation and innuendo about what is not known about an individual. Hearsay at best, rumour and gossip at worst. Thursday and Friday's encounters presented me with some significant challenges with respect to what important people in my life were saying to me and what my gut instinct was telling me about their assertions. Scott Peck in his book "People of the Lie" - an excellent read for anyone wanting some guideposts - stated that one of the best indicators that someone was trying to deceive you was a sense of confusion, even when what was being offered seemed straightforward. That was the kind of feeling that was predominant in the encounters. Those encounters required action if the information offered was true and the sooner the better, but there was this deep in the gut doubt that had no basis in any provable fact. I'm a strong believer in giving people the benefit of the doubt, you see. This time all the warning bells were so loud I couldn't disregard them. Writing about the specifics would have encoded the lies - if that's what they were. There also seemed to be an attempt to gather information about my own intentions and plans that felt negative or harmful in someway.
Since it was as the astronomical Saturn - Neptune opposition was just separating and the eclipse was approaching, I felt as though I was in dense fog with no chance of achieving clarity. I had arranged with some friends to do a meditation, sending out the most positive thoughts I could during the eclipse, so I focussed my energies on that, rather than trying to work on the other puzzles. Trusting the truth would reveal itself in time. You see," Magic (miracles) requires, and is dependent upon, time and space in which to operate". (Severus Snape in the Harry Potter series discussing the use of thoughts to influence reality). The lunar eclipse on Saturday was an echo of the eclipse one year ago. Sending thoughts of clarity and positivity back in time to that first event through the connection of the two seemed the best opportunity to work toward the highest good after all. It took until late this afternoon before I felt a positive reaction to the weekend's prayer and meditation. Hard work. The reward was a feeling of release that allows me to move forward into a new cycle of activity.
In the daily sense, I spent part of Saturday looking after my youngest grandson. He is five months old now. As he grows, his strawberry red hair and green eyes are becoming more pronounced, as is the fact that he has his father's temperment. A true Taurus his Dad, oh my. He has his mom's laugh though and hopefully her sense of humour. Irish eyes and all that, I think. They dropped me off at the Pho House when they returned from their errands, where I met my youngest for dinner before we headed off to buy groceries for a very empty cupboard. The young lady serving us was incredibly rude. She had her cell phone and was talking constantly to whoever was on the other end. When I tried to speak with her she would turn her back while I was in mid-sentence. I'm not a loquacious person by any means. I try to be sparing in my use of words and was simply trying to convey my and my son's wishes for our orders to her. She was a little more attentive when my son walked in from his work, but just barely. It appeared that her family - the kitchen staff - had made her come in to help, but it would have been more satisfactory if I had been told to just come up to the till to order. Oh well. We have visited that restaurant a lot and this is the first time we have had a bad experience. The food itself was also not good. It tasted as though the ingredients were rancid. Bleagh. By the time we finished shopping it was 10 in the pm. At home, the groceries were stowed and then we both headed off to our respective beds to rest.
�
�
