03:48 - 09.02.07
Schedules
It was a sort of conflicted day today, dear diary. Not really any one thing - just small sideways slips. For example, at my in-community bus stop one new male rider. Slight Atlantic province accent, but a great deal more knowledgable and assured than the average ex-pat from our east coast. He was taking the bus to work for the first time and was asking me about schedules and connections. Truth is the area where he is travelling is one where I have some knowledge, but not enough to feel confident offering up advice. I tried to be honest about that. Next up he was talking about his job - outside on a very cold morning doing construction on a major project. He was worrying about what his boss would do if he was late. He was catching the first bus out of the community, but work schedules/bosses don't often recognize that transit users are limited travel-wise in the early hours of the day. There simply is no service. The young women who are sometimes a difficulty, but who have been quite nice this week, arrived just as the bus pulled up. Other than the one male and me that was all the passengers to board at that stop. Where were the others? One worries about fellow travellers on frigid days like these. Mistakes can be dangerous to one's health.
Downtown the connector bus was quite late. It was still very cold with a biting wind. One bus for another route went by before mine arrived and showered me with brown, slimy street sludge. Fortunately it was pretty close to frozen, so little damage was done. In the interim also, one lady who complains constantly to the bus drivers about the scheduling decided to advocate about the problem directly to me. She is from a South American country I think. A good part of her frustration is that she is trying to figure out the route connections in a language in which she is not comfortable. To try and understand her anxiety and angst, I thought about what it would feel like to be in a country where German was the first language, for example. I have enough conversational German to keep me from starving or to make change in euros, but reading and interpreting something as complex as written instructions for very complicated schedules would likely be quite a painful exercise. If any variables in that scheduling changed unexpectedly or frequently but at random, as our bus schedules here are wont to do, I know I would be hooped unless someone more conversant with the language was with me. Part of the problem would be I wouldn't likely realize the problem was with the schedulers and not my poor language skills. Some of our other fellow travellers listened in to the discussion, but didn't add anything. I think they were feeling sorry for me. I really didn't mind though, it's just part of the charm of using transit - the unexpected and arcane. I was covered with snow when the bus finally did arrive and was thoroughly chilled to the bone. The other lady's rant had distracted me so I didn't even notice until I boarded the connector.
Arrived at my son's home trying to navigate very icy sidewalks. I had ordered a book that was derived from some of the the children's shows in my daughter-in-law's culture and it had arrived the day before. I had sent it along with my son when he dropped me off home the evening before, so that they could read it to my grand-daughter during her bath time - one of their special family rituals. When I arrived this morning it appeared it had been quite a hit with her ladyship. She loved the bright colours. The main character looks and acts quite a bit like one of the main story characters we watch every weekday, so there was a cross-cultural resonance with it too. A harmonizing of values and perspectives. Bonus.
The day itself was similar to most others. Young miss made a big mess in her diapers just after Dad left. Took a long time to clean her and all her clothing up until they were pressentable, but there was no reason for dismay. No schedule but our own to keep after all. She played with her new book and sang. She loves to practice walking, so that is becoming an increasingly dominant factor in our daliy routine. The confusion didn't start until my daughter-in-law arrived home after work. She was telling me their family's schedule for the next few days. Problem is it didn't fit with what my son had said in the morning. One of the factors influencing their disagreement seemed to be a call the day before that they received from the daycare that my grand-daughter will attend. The owner had said an unexpected opening had arisen and that my grand-daughter could start Friday - today. It appeared to me each of the adults had a different opinion on whether to enroll my grand-daughter earlier or not. They still hadn't come to an agreement by this morning, so I was plied with each one's response instead of any type of concrete plan. Not my call. They hashed it out over dinner.
Quite frankly, I don't think children under 3 years old should be in congregated settings like that. They need more personalized attention in those critical years when personality is developing. That said, given today's societal pressures and the lack of stay-at-home parents, added into the cult of the expert - daycare providers given that title over in home care givers like neighbours, family and friends - it is easy to see why families struggle with finding the right situation for their own children. I had my two oldest son's in a dayhome when they were small because I was working to put their Dad through college. It lasted about two weeks, then I pulled them out in disgust. My mother was a much better choice for a caregiver, but at that time there was no subsidy for having family members care for your child - only subsidies for for-profit daycares.
That is totally unfair if free choice of care that meets the best interest of the child is a cornerstone of a society's stated values, isn't it. One daycare owner, speaking at a conference on poverty, summarized the official attitude by stating that "when a woman decides to become a useful part of society by returning to the paid workforce then, if she is responsible, she puts her child in a daycare." Being my usual calm self, I stood up at that point in the lecture and took a strip off the speaker stating that MOTHERS - not just women - were useful and responsible parts of our society because they stayed home and did without material things for their child's sake. I then went on to state that the best solution for most children of mothers who were forced to work in order to make ends meet, was to have the option of placing their child in the setting - including with other family members - that met the childs needs, not the bottom line of some daycare owner's business. There was quite a bit of applause from the audience for me while I was saying that and that daycare owner did come by after the presentation to apologize for their comments. The problem, of course, is that they made the public apology because it was obvious my comments reflected the attitude of a lot of the audience. It isn't much different than what the federal government has done with child benefits now. They've removed more than half the actual real benefit that was available to parents before they took power and they now support only those families whose wealth/income is at the high end of the tax bracket. They have actually increased the financial burden for families who truly need help.
Anyway almost time to start another day so, good bye for now dear diary.
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