12:51 PM - 29.10.04
Feed Your body, feed your soul
I dreamt I was preparing to take my sons to Disneyland. Last time we were there was just after my Mom's Dad died. It was his wish that we go and he left the money for the airfare. My Mom was very emotional about the whole thing and wanted us to go immediately. At the time I was pregnant with number six son and was hemmorhaging badly. I went to see my doctor about it and he was not a happy man. What are you going to do if you go into labour? Go to a hospital, of course. I really didn't know the difference between the two systems and I rarely, if ever, bucked my Mom's wishes. Truth was the cost to us was still quite a bit more than we could afford, but it was likely the only chance that would come to go as a family, so we took what was offered with thanks. I love Disneyland and have a lot of fond memories of the different times spent in California, as well as some pretty harrowing memories too. Riots and encounters with Hell's Angels on the road and with some fairly scary civil rights issues that were less violent than the riots, but just as unnerving in their own right. The coast road up western North America to British Columbia makes just about anything worthwhile though - another trip, that one with my parents and sibs that is.
In this dream, I seem to be both working and going to university - yes! The tickets and other expenses come as a gift from a source I can't track. I go to the registrar of the university and she is very excited for us. The boys seem younger and they are all busily and joyously packing. I am on my own as a single mom in the dream, but my living conditions are a lot less dire than what they were here in this reality. The work situation was a lot more stable and paid a wage that made the financial aspect of parenting possible, but the workplace was not happy about the time away with the boys. I decided to take them anyway because I felt it was in their best interests. At that point it seemed like one of those Disney shows where the passing of time is indicated by a series of postcards with different seasons cycling through. I see the marks I am getting at university and am very pleased. Christmas seems almost magical and spring offers great promise. Then the phone rang and I woke up. Bummer.
Yesterday was a bit of everything. I tried dealing with the service that provides my security features for my computer - I just wanted their assistance to recover my "sent" emails. They do this text messaging support service and there was about an hour's worth of discussion. Their whole attitude was "we offer protection, but take no responsibility if it doesn't work". Right - then why am I subscribing to your service? Think I'll be researching other service providers soon.
They sent me to the site of the providers of the e-mail service - guess you know who that is don't you dear diary. Looked at the cost to deal with a live technician as opposed to their FAQs which would likely waste a lot of my time without ever addressing the problem. Decided I couldn't afford it and went back to the instant messaging thing. Finally gave up and checked my own tech folder in my e-mail to see if I could find anything in there that might help. I receive one e-zine called the Internet Tutor - to subscribe go to Tutor - that focusses mostly on webpage maintenance and coding issues because someday I would really like to have more skills in that area anyway. Found an issue from April that might have exactly what I need. Recovery of data after a series of different types of disasters. The initial download is free and the charge for the paid service isn't too bad either. The Tutor site also highlights interesting or helpful websites plus offers good basic advice on dealing with everyday computer problems and always has a great trivia quiz included too. The last one was on Charlie Daniels and I was amazed how well I did answering questions about his music. We all need a boost to our self esteem sometimes, right?
Went out for coffee and cinnamon buns with the friend from the election last night. Ended up talking about traumas in our lives. Great for venting, but came home awfully tired from it too. We walked around the perimeter of the community for another hour or so after we left the coffee place you see - just to wear some of the decadence off. Fresh, crisp, clean air to breathe, good company and good exercise with police cars cruising by intermittently, meaning we didn't give a thought to safety issues at all. Let those men in black look after us, we did. The only downside was that my ankles refused to work for a while after. I wore my snowboots because of the ice on the ground and my legs just aren't used to dealing with that much weight attached to them after a summer of bare feet at home and sneakers at work. Oh well, good for giving better shape and definition to one's calfs - right - the ones at the back of the legs, dear diary, not the bovine ones.
This morning talked with my sister's sister in law. There are several film production companies here - we have a healthy movie industry growing here and she designs dance costumes - ball gowns being her specialty. Apparently, the service is also needing a lot of "women of a certain age" for extras, so she signed up for that as well and said that I should get signed up too. I just might at that. Getting paid just to be part of a crowd scene I can handle.
I also got an email back from the psychologist I had touched base with in regard to her assisting with some counselling work in this city. When I had helped bring in counselling services to this area as a volunteer there were some who wanted to make certain that alternate healtht therapies were also available to meet the diverse needs of our United Nations of cultures in the community. Jungian therapy and the use of archetypes and mythology in counselling had been discussed, but never really took hold. Too much opposition from the mainstream therapists. The psychologist in question was the one who spearheaded the first attempt and he said he would see where the land lay now and what might be available. Best that I can do for her right now.
Anyway, I'd best go and send out some more resumes for me. I like helping other people, but I'd better be sure I help myself as well right? I don't really enjoy eating all that much, but the body seems fixed on getting some nourishment every day.
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