02:08 - 29.01.08
RxMercury
I checked the temperature just before leaving the house for my morning interview. With the windchill: -45. I had changed my mind about what to wear as it appeared the temperature might actually drop as wind gusts occurred. Even though it was an important interview, surviving a couple of hours out walking/standing in the cold was a greater priority. Three layers of clothing topped with the coat, two hats, and two scarves. I had two pairs of gloves in my purse, but dropped one of a set on the way out the door. No time to go back to retrieve it, since there had been news reports that the trains had been freezing to the tracks - the switches not working, you see. For my end of the city the average delay was 30 minutes - skin freezes in less than 5 minutes with the wind chill factors in play. Hmmmm. The bus arrived exactly on time so that portion of the journey was easy - relatively speaking. The force of the wind in my face made breathing tricky. Never try to breathe with one's mouth open in such weather; it's a good way to freeze one's lungs.
There are glass shelters on the train platform, but they were built with a 4" gap at the bottom and a 2" gap at the top - "to allow for air circulation" is what I'm certain some bright, shining star at "silly hall" decided, when they approved the plans. The heaters are located at the very top of the ceiling so the 100 or so travellers standing with me, waiting for that train frozen to the tracks to thaw, all watched that nice, warm air stream out the gap in the roof as the frigid arctic wind whistled through the 4" gap at the bottom of the shelter. I was born and raised here. I've survived longer, colder arctic conditions, but I've never found myself intentionally put in a position where the architecture actually intensified and concentrated the cold on one's body. To add insult to injury, the seats in the shelter are made of metal. Can't wait to see what happens at +30 C. One would think that our city fathers would at least hire people to design buildings who understand basic physic's principles of heat retention and transfer and who might actually have had to try taking transit in local weather conditions. They could have asked a class of grade six students, for example, with better design results. Grumble. Despite my - 30 tights, socks and boots, my toes were nearly frostbitten by the time that train - and two extra trains shortly after - pulled into the station.
Propped my feet right on the heat register on the train. By the time we reached downtown, they were defrosted enough to safely walk the couple of blocks to the office where the meeting was scheduled. The journey had consumed 90 minutes - more than double the usual one-way travel time. The wind was even stronger in the canyons between office towers downtown, so I concentrated on keeping the second scarf wrapped around my face. I hadn't worn my contact lenses and that proved to be a very good decision. As I approached my destination, I realized there was a fire truck sitting in the middle of the street. Oh no! Didn't see any flames shooting out of the building, so I followed the cheerful gentleman, who had paused to hold the doors open for me, into the building. In the main foyer, by the security desk, was a large crowd of unusually cheerful office workers. Appeared that the building that needed the fire crew's attention was the one across the street. Phew. When I commented on it to the agency's receptionist as she greeted me, she reacted with shock. She hadn't noticed anything untoward, although she did recollect hearing sirens earlier in the morning. Dedicated to her work, I guess. The meeting with the agent went very well, with a lot of positive comments from her as the interview progressed. She gave me homework - studying the two companies she thinks would be a good fit for me, as well as sending her additional information about myself. Both companies are ones I know well by reputation and would feel great to be employed in. Meaningful work.
I should have taken Mr Mercury going retrograde today into account for more than just the travelling, though. At the very end of the interview, I asked if there were any last pieces of advice for me when I attended the interviews at those companies. Yes, be professional at all times. Each industry has it's own definition of "professional". This is one that is new to me, so I asked for clarification on what that would mean in an interview. "Wear a suit." Oi. I have a couple of beautiful suits, both of which are way too tight and out of date now. "Well then buy one." Wish I could, but right now even buying groceries is dicey - not that I said that of course. Just commented that my current budget would not allow for the expense.
By then, with the fatigue from the earlier travel challenges setting in, I was beginning to feel a certain amount of distress. Focussing on the problem just raised, I didn't think of other solutions or alternatives. Brain freeze - right? I was actually feeling a bit defeated, in that, yet again, it seemed some factor other than my experience, knowledge, and skills was the measure of whether I would be hired or not. The agent had stressed several times that my skills and personal presentation were more than satisfactory and that my compensation expectations "were more than reasonable". Poverty should not be a barrier to gaining employment - should it? After all, once I start getting regular paycheques, I can buy new suits. I should have asked at that point if alternatives like skirts, blazers and dresses would be allowed. I think because I was already wearing a merino wool skirt and an Italian sweater I assumed that they hadn't been seen as acceptable to the interviewer. Muddled my way along a new-to-me section of the plus 15 (indoor walkway) while trying to figure out where I was going to find something suitable to wear.
The journey home was much quicker, although the public announcement system was still stating that trains were delayed. I must have made it to the platform with much better timing, because I waited less than five minutes for the return train. Three people of British citizenship were standing next to me displaying the "stiff upper lip" so characteristic of their culture. Find the silver lining was the verbal exercise being shared among them. Fun to listen in. When I walked back in my home there was a call from the agent I had just met. She had tried to reach me before our interview to give me the chance to reschedule our meeting to when the weather was less dangerous, but I had been travelling for nearly an hour by then. It was kind of her to be so flexible though. One of my sisters had also left a message, wishing me a happy birthday. Checking my email as I listened to those messages, I noticed that the agent had sent me the name of a charity that supplies upscale clothes to women who can't afford their own. Again I appreciated the thoughtfulness, but it really made me feel diminished. Just once it would be nice if substance was valued as much as packaging. The agent asked me to let her know if I wanted her to put my name forward. I appreciated her extra effort on my behalf, but I was wondering if I should even go to an interview where I felt I was there under false pretenses.
Returned that one sister's call (the other two had called me the evening before) and talked with her about it. She offered to share some of her wardrobe, until I got on my feet financially. My sister doesn't have any suits, but she didn't see why a combination of skirts, blazers and dresses wouldn't be allowed either. Called the agent back to see if that would be acceptable. In the meantime one of my sons called to talk about how his life was unfolding - new developments and a training session in the province one over - as well as to wish me a happy birthday too. He said he and one of my other sons could probably help me out if the suit requirement was absolutely necessary. I felt much better after those two calls for certain, although then I was wondering if I would be able to determine what was an acceptable suit and how I would find one in time if the interview was scheduled quickly. The agent called back and said that the alternatives I had come up with were fine and that she hadn't meant to come across so strongly about it just being a suit only that was acceptable. I think when one is beginning to feel that one's back is to the wall - as I do - that everything starts to become overwhelming when it really isn't. When one's focus becomes narrowed to just the problems, it is hard to see all the other options that might work. That doesn't happen with me very often, but I must admit this job search has me foxed. Don't know why that is exactly, because the financial circumstances are ones I have had to face before. It was the norm for that decade and a half as a single mom with six young sons to feed, clothe and shelter. Just Mr Mercury and the frosty air addling my brain I guess.
Anyway time for crawling under my comforter. I'm still a bit cold from the day's journey. Good night dear diary.
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