12:11 AM - 13.02.05
Hello good bye.
My youngest and I had another set to about my version of clean as opposed to his. When I walked in yesterday it looked like a nuclear blast zone. Given the week I'd already had that was just the one last straw - a whole weekend of doing nothing but cleaning when what I really need is time to dance. I know a lot has to do with the number of cats we currently have resident, but I've also asked him to post notices in several of the stores and vets offices here and his reply last night was that it would take too long. Well if he had started a few weeks ago when I'd asked it would have all been done by now and some of these kittens would have their own adoring family to love them all to themselves. The other last straw was the progress n school work. Again a lot of the barrier to completing things is that the cats think sitting down humans are unacceptable and will do just about anything to get us up and moving. However, home schooling does demand the discipline to set targets and work toward them. If you don't start it is impossible to finish. Just too many unfinished responsibilities and I wasn't in any shape to accept excuses.
Things are back under control now and that is a good thing. When I opened my email last night there was a little note from Elections Canada letting us know they'd be sending out an assignment for us to complete. Deadlines? The other reason for the panic reaction last night. Have an office confirmed by March first - this March first as in about two weeks time. Now even if I could go looking all day, every day, there is still the issue of lack of available rentable space in Calgary and particularly in this area. Remember what happened last year at about this time? I went out looking on the premise an election call was imminent, got everything done and then was left cooling my heels until late May along with 307 other Returning Officers. No one's fault, just the way the politics played out last year. With a minority Government the balance is even touchier and the most dangerous time for one is during budget deliberations. Those begin on the 23 of this month and that is why these precautions are being taken. I do truly appreciate that but last night I wasn't processing things well enough to see the bright side of the picture. th office space is just one of several things we have to complete in this assignment but we won't know exactly what until it actually arrives. They aren't sending those out until next week. Remember that deadline? we have more time for some of the other things but I can't take time off right now with this assignment winding down. And what do I say in that interview on Monday? I really want the assignment being offered. Oh my aching head.
Anyway I bit the bullet today and just focussed on getting one thing out of the way each one at a time. All I can do really. I've sent off about a dozen e-mails to realtors, critical staff and co-workers in Ottawa trying to get some of the tasks I am fairly certain are the first in line things done now. Worked on some of my contract/interview related needs as well two letters to the two different recruitment/placement agencies I'm dealing with right now. More info requested and I have to get those references confirmed. One yes already and an autorespond where they won't be back until Tuesday. When I had asked my supervisor for time to talk about the last assignment I also realized that it would probably be wise to put together a report that summarised the major issues so we don't waste any time trying to come to agreement on what should be discussed. The last month of fighting to get through to him made it very clear that verbal communications are not going to ensure that he hears what I am saying. He doesn't like working from paper or email but ther are too many unfinishd bits of business includung some due diligence issues. They need to be addressed now.
Unfinished business seems to be the theme this weekend in terms of thing astrological times I cited in my post when I was talking with the sister's sister in law. It is as though the cycle has come full circle and I'm being offered the opportunity to set a few things back in balance. For my own sake I need to do that. The problem is that with all the competing imperatives all of a sudden, it is hard to fit it all in. However, sometimes one has to slow everything down in order to move ahead. That unfinished business or repressed energy keeps coming back in many different guises like the hydra - you know the one that kept growing multiple new heads each time one of the old ones was cut off. Got to figure out how to strike at the heart of the matters instead of just the manifestations. No more bandaids on the cancer, if you please.
First order of business though? Go finish the dishes. In zen terms "Before enlightenment - chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment - chop wood, carry water." So Grasshopper, I guess we carry water now chop wood later. Aloha, Salaam, Shalom and Sayonara all.
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