1:00 AM - 03.01.05
New Day
I dreamt of being at university. Living in a dormitory built like a maze. Multiple levels and corridors that led to unexpected rooms or stairways arising out of nowhere. There was one entryway where everyone, but my friends and I, turned left into a lounge of some sort. We always went right into a wide light-filled corridor - high ceilings with skylights. It felt like a place of worship but there were no fixtures, just open sky framed by the glass, no chairs to sit on either. I caught a glimpse of myself at one point - dramatic dark brown hair and oval face - kind of a Spanish influence. I think my hair was braided and it reached my waist. I was wearing red which outlined my figure very nicely. All red clothing - something I wouldn't do in waking life. Not since my teens anyway when a group of older women made some really disparaging comments about my character based on that choice of colour. Whatever. My friends and I were very close and we laughed a lot, moving from lesson to lesson with anticipation and pleasure. I'm not certain what it meant because there was no focus- just a sense of comraderie I haven't felt for years. I miss that, but there isn't anyone who I feel that close to right now. Maybe this a hint of things to come. One can always hope.
Cats was the theme - naughty creatures but lovable all at once. When the three sisters all had their babies within a week of each other that one time, they would put all the kittens in one blanket in the closet then walk around the outside of the circle they made, just purring constantly. It was obvious those babies felt safe and loved. Yesterday all the cats did the same thing - only it was me that was their focus. Wherever I went they would rise and start purring when I came near. It was quite the experience and I felt much calmer for it.
It's a funny thing the way cats purr. For most one can see their tongues sticking out just a fraction from all sides of their mouth. It reminds me of the description of how to make the "LL" sound in Welsh that was offered in Susan Cooper's Book the "Grey King". It is a great read and won the Newberry Award the year it was published. It and the previous book - "The Dark is Rising" have that mystical sense of wonder and of possibilities that are signatures of good childrens' stories.
At one point yesterday I was one the phone answering a marketing survey about local radio stations. I was amazed how little I could say anymore since their services were central to my life at one time. Now it is the discman for music and the internet or or TV news for information, with newspapers providing the fodder for research. The surveyor was very polite even though I was feeling frustrated with the way things were going. The detail of the questions was weel beyond my ability to respond and the music he was playing was the old elevator tunes - at leat from my point of view. I won't actively choose most of it and the pieces I did like I have on CD, no need for random radio pdial play. Ms Badger must have realized I was bugged a bit. She climbed up on the table, laid directly in front of me on her back all four legs in the air tongue lolling out of her mouth. I was giggling - the poor surveyor must have thought he had someone with dementia at that point.
Today Ms Kitty's brood found a new way to tease their siblings. My closet is where I store things of a "party" nature, including balloons. They discovered them about a week ago and now delight in waving them tantalizingly under the door. When one of the cats in the hallway tries to carry away the treasure they pull the balloon back with hoots of kitty laughter following. The game has gone on for hours at a time - one cat at a time.
My only real accomplishment today was getting out for groceries. I dressed as I have the past week, based on the weather channel data. Found I only needed about half the layers I had pulled on. The basket in my cart was filled with all the bits of clothing I had peeled off one garment at a time as I wandered up and down the aisles. No different than a lot of other shoppers though.
When I arrived back home I emailed my supervisor with my monthend timesheet and the list of questions and concerns I had documented over the past week - except for the observation about the infighting going on in the finance group, since it has nothing to do with us at this point. He had said he would try to come by to see me last week when he called Christmas Eve and I would have preferrd to discuss some of the issues face to face, but I knew that wasn't likely given his work load. It was obvious when I called him about my paycheque on Friday that he was really pressed for time. He still made the time to make those extra calls for and to me that day though. Can't ask for more, but I do want some input before I commit some of my comments to paper in the weekly report. We'll see.
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