9:52 PM - 30.08.04
Tantra/Creativity
Fireworks lighting up the night sky. It's the end of the International Global Festival here. The highlight was the nightly fireworks competition from countries around the world - last night is tonight. In Vancouver, the crowd watching the finale was counted at about 2 million. I know we won't reach that number, but that isn't the point either is it.
That Pluto thang I spoke about two days ago? "Take Another Little Piece of My Heart Now, Baby" Janis Joplin. I'm still processing what transpired yesterday dear diary. I think it will be a while before I can deal with it. Remember I said I was waiting for the other shoe to drop with respect to my daughter in law being in the hospital? Well number one son, his partner, the grandbabies and number three son arrived around suppertime last night and I got the whole story, finally. A society's level of civilization is measured by how it treats its children and their families - the weak and the vulnerable. Ours fails miserably and that was evident last night. Worst of it is I haven't the resources to help or to fight back either. One of those times when the measure of a human being's value to the community is only determined by the size of the paycheck backing them. Doesn't mean silence though - silence is consent to the way one is treated and that isn't part of the picture. Some cages are going to rattle. Still won't change what has happened, but at least it will be harder to inflict it on the next poor family that has the same challenge to face. Fireworks.
That theme carried on with the e-mail I sent to my supervisor. I described the events of the past week at work and aired my concerns about how the assignment was going. I hate someone thinking that they can lie and manipulate me at will. Do so at one's own peril. I don't retaliate, but I do tend to want to expose the behaviours and the motives - when I can figure them out. In this case I can guess, but not confirm so no action yet. However, I did ask my supervisor for another assignment if this one doesn't become more reasonable soon.
At work today, the brother brought me the CD he has recorded. Whoa, left me weak at the knees and I don't even like Country and Western music that much. The added bonus was that about 80% of the material was written by him. I think what I dislike about C & W is that the lyics are too often shallow, crude and whiny. Now, admittedly I was listening to ABBA when he arrived with his CD, but at least they are playful and upbeat - right, "I Had a Dream". These were none of the above. A lot of power in this man's poetry, especially in his willingness to openly express the emotions he experienced in some of his relationships. Add in a voice that is truly beautiful. His family must be very proud of him.
I asked again, and he tried to explain, why the record company that was working with him wouldn't produce or distribute his work. I still don't understand the mechanisms. He said something about being given a chance to be "showcased" but that the price the company was going to charge him up front for the privilege was way beyond his means. Another way civilization is measured in any society. Are artists and scholars valued only for the amount of money they can pay out first, or who they can sell themselves to in exchange for the privilege of expressing their gifts or instead for the gifts that they are born with by the Grace of the Almighty. Since when did the divine need the permission of scuzzy little marketers to share such gifts with the rest of us through people with so much to offer. What a waste stuck in a cubbyhole or a corporate boardroom. I listened to the CD as I worked on technical analysis for most of the day. Eased the pain I was feeling a bit and made the tasks less tedious by far. If the brother is lucky, I won't learn his lyrics well enough to sing along - spoil a perfect CD, that would.
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