8:44 p.m. - 2004-05-04
Eclipse
Today was good until I got home dear diary. I think I'll try and see if the building I'm working in really does lock down at night - safe haven, maybe. This morning I left home at "commuter hours". It was quite a shock to the system, given the last time I did that was back in January. I hadn't gone to bed until 2 am - which was never unusual before, but I hadn't had a nap like I usually do the evening before, because the boys AND the neighbours were all whooping and hollering because our hockey team beat out Detroit in the hockey playoffs. Next up, either San Jose or Denver I guess. Anyway it was a beautiful breezy spring morning. There was someone waiting in a car just a bit to the left of my home - the neighbours always have people picking them up at all hours of the day. Nice looking guy - well alright I didn't have my contact lens' in yet - but at least clean cut. Anyway he pulled away without a passenger just after I left my home. Strange - well maybe not - since I suspect the neighbours "partied" late and probably just didn't wake up. Poor guy, but it kind of threw me for a loop wondering why he was there - one house robbery years ago and I still get paranoid when something out of the pattern happens.
Most people on the bus had the same "I should have gone to bed" look I did. See, hockey is bad for you. It was a subdued ride into work. Found out one of the reasons we're there today. Part of the fields for each record are already filled in in the database we are cleaning up. There is someone else in the company who is responsible for that. I found some fairly serious (and potentially costly) errors in just about every record I opened today. I took one of the most obvious ones to my liaison in the company. She really tensed up, said there were significant problems with that part of the database, but that the person in control was impossible to deal with. She looked quite overwhelmed. It's hard to be in a job where no matter how hard you try, someone else has the power to undercut your efforts continuously. I felt badly for her.
The reason I can empathize is that when I got home Elections Canada issues were lying in wait for me. An angry letter from the woman who tried to force me to give another Returning Officer's information cc'd to the big guy. Great. How can one defend one's self when a phone conversation is being misrepresented. I don't think saying no to her was being rude - it goes against privacy legislation and I told her that. Some members of the public don't seem to understand that our private lives are not available as service time for them. I wonder what a store clerk would do if people called them at home wanting them to give out their co-workers numbers or provide service outside of work time. Ditto for bank tellers, office workers and anyone else who has contact with the public.
To top it off, one Returning Officer calls up on a regular basis - like tonight - herself and just yells about all the things that are wrong with what is happening. I can't disagree with a lot of what she says, but it is very tiring to be on the receiving end of the tirades and it doesn't help me find a balance either. It is also a bit unnnerving when she tells me what she plans to do to get back at people who have annoyed her. It also makes me nervous, because I don't know how she represents our conversations to other people. She seems to call around a lot and sometimes I've already heard a version of the story from one or two other people that don't line up with hers. Is she creating division and conflict on purpose? If so, why? See what I mean about paranoia? I'm tired and I just wish the politicians would decide when on the election so I can focus on something more positive.
Anyway time for stories. The cats are mad at me too for deserting them. They ignored me for a while tonight and then made me feel so guilty when they all wanted to cuddle all at the same time - big, sad eyes looking at me as if they were really hurt. If I could find a way to be "an at home Mom" without losing my home I would. I like my time with my family, my cats and you, dear diary. Maybe I'm just feeling the eclipse. There were a lot of teary eyes on the bus on the way home and I couldn't come up with any other explanation. Moon affects emotions - si?
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