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3:08 p.m. - 2004-01-29
Many hues
Birthdays today for Tom Selleck, Oprah and WC Fields - see there are lots of cool Aquarius'. No entry last night dear diary, because one of diaryland's servers was kaput.

I finally went outside today. It was necessary because there was a letter waiting for me at the post office and we had completely run out of edibles for the cats. -26 C. With the wind chill factor it felt like -38 C/F though. I was doing ok until I reached the shopping mall parking lot. There is about another blocks' walk from there, and the wind loves to swirl and dance around the open flat pavement. In the summer that's ok but it made the last bit really difficult. The shops were nearly deserted so I was done quickly but I was still feeling exhausted by the time I got home. Outside workers are only allowed to be out for 15 minutes at a go - then they have to spend some time indoors so that they can recover from the cold.

Three dreams of note. The first was centered around a lizard known as a goanna in Australia. It is a member of the monitor lizard family. This little guy's skin was an emerald green, with a mottled mossy appearance. As cute as a button and seemed to be the familly pet. He always seemed to be traveling on his back legs either walking or hopping, and his favorite pastime was to be cuddled by his humans - including me. There didn't seem to be any point to the dream except to convey affection and playfulness.

The second dream seemed to be an allegory of sorts. There were three circus performers travelling around the country side. Two men and one woman; the woman acting in the same way as Joanne Worley from the program "Laugh-in". Loud and brazen, but with a lot of insight too on the outside, internally she had a deep perception of peoples's strength and weaknesses that made her performances very powerful - cathartic - for her audiences. All three wore cake make-up and their outfits were something between clowns and Marcel Marceau - the famous French mime. Problem was that the two men were picking pockets and otherwise shaking down the crowds while their attention was focussed on the woman. As the dream progressed the trio kept pushing the envelope of what they would try; seeing themselves as very clever - avoiding, they thought, detection of their real activities. From the vantage point of the "observer", I could see a very low key detective slowly drawing them in, allowing them to "hang themselves" by their own greed and hubris. I still don't know if the "detective" was a real person or some form of "fate" waiting for his moment. Left me deep in thought even though I was "asleep" at the time.

The third dream seemed to be about my supervisor. It appeared that he and his daughter were on holiday. There was the sound and smell of the ocean not far away and the flora was tropical. Lucky right? The sun felt hot and soothing on their skins as they boarded some sort of "bus". Their seat companion was a woman who worked at the court house. She was on her way to work so they must have been heading for the downtown of the city they were in. At some point rain began and all of a sudden I was standing on the road looking down into a deep trench of some sort. The bus had slidd into it because of the drenching rain and had become buried underneath the mud. Next, I found myself inside the lobby of either a very large gracious old mansion or something like a lobby to a grand hotel or maybe a hospital. Everyone who had survived the accident was there being cared for. They were waiting for more people to be brought in from the rescue operations as well. I'm not certain if it was my supervisor or his daughter that was there since all I could tell was that I was looking out of that person's eyes, but they were waiting for the other one to arrive. It was still raining and I knew that the woman who had been going to work hadn't survived the crash. The door flew open and the press walked in wanting to talk with the bus passengers. The person whose eyes I was looking out from quickly grabbed ther travelling bag and retreated to a washroom. They wanted sometime alone and they didn't want to talk with anyone right then. Can't blame them. By that time I was feeling quite upset and I woke up.

Maybe that last one was triggered somehow by the phone call just before I went to bed. It was from the vice principal who I went to school with years ago. Her first words were "are you all right?" "Yes - why what do you know that I don't?" "You haven't checked your email since supper then?" "no" "Well, I'm sorry to be the bearer of the bad news then but C (from our graduating class) died today - they think from heart failure." What does one say? For whatever reason, my friend seemed to feel that there was something wrong in my life too. She kept asking if I was alright even after I said I was fine and gave proof of that by detailing my last few months. Sure there have been rough patches, but what adult doesn't experience those. Frustrated I am at my progress, but I've already admitted that is my own fault for not being patient. Maybe something about the death panicked my friend and she was projecting her concerns onto me. Don't know.

One of the most interesting article in my e-zines this morning was about plasma thrusters. Specifically a new one developed in Australia that uses hydrogen. plasma. New energy source and at a guess, the by-products would be water. Two for one deal. Two other articles of note came from the New Zealand Herald and the Christian Aid Society in England. The first was about the inquiry into bioterrorism specialist Dr. Kelly's death. Suicide. I'm glad someone is challenging the conclusions. One does not die from slashing one's wrist unless one removes it from the hand. Nor did the "overdose" line ring true. We'll see. The second again deals with social responsibility and large corporations - be they public, like our governments or private like Enron. SocialStudies101.

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