10:27 p.m. - 2004-01-07
Sex and Transformation
Technology really does alter the way we interact with the world or view reality sometimes, doesn't it? In my in-box tonight, a note from one of my brothers-in-law with clippings from the Winnipeg Free Press. The obits for my Mom's Aunt and cousin. Silly how a few words on a piece of paper - or a collection of electrons herded across a monitor - can bring such comfort. Acknowledgement and closure at least. The rest can only come with time or outside of it. I expect a whole band of pipers (bagpipes that is) when it's my turn to cross over - all those Scots waiting for me. One of my other brothers-in-law commented that this New Years the best party was likely the one our deceased family would be having since two of his aunts died just recently too. He's probably right.
In old style astrology, the ascendant is considered a critical point on one's birth chart. It is posited that that is the degree or doorway through which the soul entered this dimension at birth. Sometimes it is the same sign as one's sun sign ( the month you were born), but the ascendant is calculated by determining the sign of the zodiac that was directly overhead at the time of birth on the day one was born. I was born a little before sunrise, and I think I've always loved that time of day best. When my guys were little I would sometimes walk over to the park I helped raise funds for and watch the sunrise before the rhythm of their day began. It was my treat to myself. Food for the soul, regeneration - like Spock in the movie Star Trek III - I guess.
The ascendant "colours" one's appearance and character and is said to determine how the rest of the world will perceive you. It is not the essence of one's being, just it's image in the community. The planet Pluto is just coming to conjunction (union) with that point in my birth chart now. Now Pluto is the planet of power, transformation, change, sex, death, winning lotteries, inheritance, and taxes. I know which of those I'd like to see manifest. "Om mane padme hum"! Chant in unison please.
However, the reason I didn't want to write last night was that I got a full blast of the "power over" aspect of Pluto - as in several sources trying to invoke or claim that right of control over me. At least that's how it felt, "I'm doing this because I can, if you protest I will determine the consequences and you will be punished". Even at the best of times we Aquarian types don't take that very kindly. The big issue yesterday was about being acknowledged, and compensated for the work I actually do,instead of what the work is being called. Control the definition of something and you control the interpretation and consequences arising from it - for example: "discipline" versus "abuse", "collateral damage" versus "murder", "corporate/political management" versus "exploitation", or "seduction" versus "rape", who draws the line?
I'm going to have to cope with that particular aspect for about a year, so thinking it over tonight, I decided to adopt some role models representing both the positive and negative aspects of that archetypal struggle. Being it's that time of year, Martin Luther King Jr (birth) and Mohandas K Gandhi (assassination) came to mind immediately. Tougher to think of women who would fit. I thought of Joan of Arc, but do I want to be burned at the stake? In this nice little Bible belt of a province, my study of other faiths and my use of things like astrology charts, yoga, mandalas, and meditation means that I have been called a witch by those of the fanatic persuasion. Latest version of that came up(you don't go to the same church as us so you must worship the devil)at work last week from two of my co-workers in the records centre. I'm doing just the tasks I'm paid (grudgingly or not at all) to do, but that seems to be threatening their sense of power there. Maybe if they would stay off the phone (sometimes for a couple of hours a morning on personal business) and just do their tasks properly it wouldn't be an issue. In fact I wouldn't even be there if that was the case, but I guess it's easier to attack someone for something totally irrelevant to the situation and try to make that the measure of who is "right" and who is "wrong". Sort of a capsule of some of the larger stories playing out globally - corporate corruption, religious fanaticism, political greed. The problem with all those role models though, as I'm sure you have been astute enough to notice, dear diary, is that they all died violently at the hands of others who felt their "power over" others was being taken away as a result of those three peoples' leadership for change. Each was espousing Sagittarian causes too, dealing with the priciples of faith, and justice. Maybe I should look for some role models who did the same work but survived. Hmmmmmm? Were there any?
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