2:08 p.m. - 2003-10-01
Constructive Criticism
I'm doing an entry now, dear diary, because I had a dream that is very slippery. I can't quite hold on to it. This morning I awoke to the sound of heavy construction equipment and strange noises coming from the kitten's nursery. The city is paving our back alley, cost added into our taxes. That's fine with me, because it will make that route to the stores much safer. Right now the bed of the alley is concave - everything drains to the center. In the winter this means it is very nearly unusable for months for those of us who walk, because the ice buildup is treacherous. It also puts our fences at risk as drivers tend to travel too fast for the conditions. I guess they see the fences as secondary brakes - don't know. As long as the road bed is properly engineered and sloped to drain away from the center, it will improve things immensely.
We moved into this community in the summer of 1979. There were only 50 houses built and occupied then. For the next 5 years, there was continuous racket from the construction and a never-ending pall of dust that was kicked up as a result of the activity. I'd forgotten what that was like. The kittens, however, have never been exposed to high noise levels, because this is now a relatively quiet residential street. When I went into their room, I was afraid that one of them was hurt or ill. That fear wasn't relieved when I opened the door either. Usually, I'm nearly knocked over by the stampede of six animals all trying to be the first out to play. This morning only Miss Kitty, who had been vocalizing mournfully during the pre-release time, and two of the babies were at the door. Even they proceeded cautiously out of the door.
I could hear the sound of the baby in distress, sort of a low cry and a growl mixed, but couldn't see any evidence of the other three cats. I followed the sound and started to talk to the nose sticking out from under the credenza (about a 2" clearance). Pasha slowly emerged and snuggled for a moment, but the wailing went on. Next out was Cheshire Cat. Skittish, but obviously of the opinion that if it was safe for Pasha and the human was nearby, then it must be safe for her. She dashed for her mom, being that she is the favorite. Surprisingly it was Ficus (we called her Nimbus until number four son, who wants her for his own, came up with his own moniker) who was making all the fuss. Ficus is usually the leader and the explorer of the group. Fearless to a reckless degree - I thought until now. She had to be cuddled and cozened for a while before she felt safe. Must be the noise.
Anyway, up until that time, I had been dreaming and the sound of the construction showed up in the dream as part of the imagery. The foreman (Pluto in drag?)in the dream was showing me different astrological charts. He was suggesting different ways that they could be re-constructed to remove some of the more negative characteristics of the people they were built for. I wasn't really interested because each person has the right and the responsibility of choosing their own path in life - free-will within the constraints of the circumstances they find themselves in or are willing to break away from to build something else for themselves. I saw a Gemini, a Sagittarius, and, I think, a Taurus and said they were fine as they were. The foreman finally pulled out the chart and interpretation for a Scorpio that he wanted to make major adjustments in, but it seemed it needed my approval before he could proceed. Now I have to admit I don't have very good success with individuals who have very strong Scorpio characteristics in their personalities. They can wound me very deeply, even though I usually care a great deal about them - there being something essentially loveable about each one I've known. I think it is because Scorpios have a natural awareness of the most vulnerable part of anyone around them and address themselves to that aspect first. Kind of like after you go to the dentist, one's tongue seems to keep going to where the surgery was - an old healing instinct? It was tempting with that chart to want to reduce the acuity of the person, so they didn't have such a bite to their personality. I considered it very briefly, then told the foreman that I wouldn't allow any change orders; that I felt the personality needed to be accepted the way it was. He started to argue with me and was quite forceful, that there needed to be amendments before he could proceed. That's when the outside construction and the cats woke me up.
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