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12:20 a.m. - 2003-04-17
Books and Music
I had a really good walk at noon yesterday. Went south toward some of the older "boutique" streets about ten city blocks away. Covered an area of 40 square blocks altogether in about forty minutes. And...what did I see? I saw three used book stores beckoning me. Bliss all in a two block area. One is called "Wee Book Inn" that has, in the past, had the best eclectic collection that is also mainstream. The other two are "the Best Little Word House" and "Shakespeare's". Covers the gamut and yet I won't have enough time to get myself into real trouble - you know carrying twenty additional pounds of baggage on the train home with my finds. There is a fabulous used bookstore just one block from where I work, but I've gotten to the point where I ask the proprietor to set a time limit for my browsing there, because I quite frankly lose my head and walk out with way more than I can possibly read. He just laughs and does as I ask and he's very firm about it too. He knows I'll be back.

What else did I see? Very unique little niche stores catering to art, music, and clothes aficionados. I think I'll have to plan so that I choose one place each journey to fully explore, leaving debit card and cash behind. Maybe this year I'll be one of those people who can crow in October about being all done my Christmas shopping. Uh huh.

Work has been calmer the past couple of days. C and I did an analysis of all the material we've been sorting through the past two weeks. There were about 225 boxes of data when I first started working on them mid-February. That's been wrestled down to about 60 consolidated boxes, all set up so that we will only have to touch a file once - much more organized. We spent yesterday calculating the amount of time it would take to get everything left catalogued and on the shelves. Then I created a spreadsheet listing all the properties the company had documentation for, that weren't in their records. Just under 200. Probably half of those are properties they call by another name - an alias -, but that is still a fairly significant amount of new property. It may also uncover more information as it is investigated. Feels good to have reached that point. It also feels good to be allowed to do the estimate myself, rather than being committed to a time line by someone who doesn't know the material or the processes necessary to complete the work properly.

C brought in a book of "Bushisms" to share this morning. Apparently there are two more quoting from GW and one more quoting from GH in print. She wants them all. A lot of what she read left me speechless, although I've seen a fair number already through my joke lists. I've spoken in public, so I know how difficult it can be to always sound articulate, but he has speechwriters and teleprompters. Very few regular speakers have that luxury. Sometimes malaprops, sophistry and disingenuousness are used to cover a ferocious intellect. Make it less threatening to the average person. But from what I heard and have read, I just don't think all the lights are on in the cabin. Our Prime Minister, on the other hand, has made a career of playing out the regional stereotype for the press "the little guy from Shawinigan" to great advantage, complete with the accent and Quebecisms, to make him quotable and approachable. But everyone knows he is playing. At least, I think they do.

B came around today busy planning for the accommodations of the summer students. I guess I'm going to be sharing my phone with one of them. I said that was fine - second year university student - as long as she takes me with her if she uses the line to plan any fun outings with her friends. Her Mother will thank me.

Went to pick up new headphones at lunch today. One side wasn't working anymore. It made me feel off balance and headachy. There was a sale, so I ended up picking up CDs of Gregorian Chants, John Denver Unplugged, and one of Canada's most respected jazz artists - George Shearing's - disk. On the way back to work, I walked by one of my favorite buskers, Tom Pirosok, and he had tapes out on sale too. Good musical day and not too expensive. The cashier even gave me a break on the headphones - $9 less than it rang up on the till.

Haven't had time to listen to them all, but the John Denver one was quite surprising. It sounded as if he had just gone into the studio and recorded, at a time when he was going through a difficult period personally. At a guess, I would say the breakdown of his marriage, since all the pieces are about loving and leaving - letting go. The work isn't as commercial as his other albums - it has a raw and passionate feel - singing with the heart. The instrumentation was different too. "For You" had piano as backup and it was soulful. Sometimes just an instrument played a certain way can move deeper into your emotions than any thing else and this time it did.

The only other time I felt such a powerful tug was about a year after my Mom died, when a very difficult situation occurred in my workplace. Through my duties, it became evident that some significant stealing was happening. What I hadn't realized was how many people were involved, or who they were. It turned out that one of the people I reported my findings to was likely involved. Even though a lawyer voluntarily helped me deal with the initial fallout, he couldn't protect me from the threats, harrassment, and an assault that followed.

One morning I woke up and I felt I just could not face another day. The tears wouldn't stop. Just then my Mom's face appeared very clearly in front of me and the radio came on. The song? Phil Collins' "You'll Be in My Heart" from the movie Tarzan. The opening line "Come stop your crying it will be alright...". I don't know how to explain it, but the sound of the guitar in the background seemed to wrap itself around me. It was as if I was a small child being rocked and comforted. That feeling stayed with me the rest of that day and would often occur anytime I felt afraid afterward.

Any way my discman worked perfectly all this afternoon. Maybe it was just tired of playing the same old tunes all the time. Oh yes, it's just microchips - no feelings.

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