10:55 p.m. - 2002-11-02
Airdrie and Cats
Well, I believe I've had a breakthrough. Since I first became ill, I've had to have a fairly long nap each evening after work so I could make it through the week. No exceptions, unless I wanted a relapse that required me to take sick days; it really messed up my sleep patterns too. Tonight the body shook the sleeping mind awake and insisted it wanted to do the yoga routine - NOW. When I was healthy that was the norm and I didn't feel right unless I got my workout. It has been a long time coming.
Part of the breakthrough seems to be because of the ujjayi breathing - it relaxes me almost the second I start. It sounds like one is purring. In addition, the first part of this paticular routine consists of a series of "cat" stretches. A few years ago, a siamese cat adopted our family for a while. He would wander in the house, help himself to whatever he wanted for supper, and then crawl into my lap and promptly go to sleep. I loved watching him move - he was so flexible and graceful. When I work through that part of the routine it's almost as if he joins me. Feels good.
Today my Dad came by and we agreed to visit one of my sisters and her family. She is number three of the four girls. Her family lives in a bedroom community that perches on the northern edge of Calgary. When they moved in, about 18 years ago, the population was just over 5000 people; now the count is over 25,000. All the other bedroom communities surrounding the city (5) have experienced similar growth as people keep spilling out of our city's tight housing market. Makes things a little tense in their community these days.
Most of the long-time residents of Airdrie are farming families and people who like to march to their own drummers - like my sister and her spouse. They don't suffer fools gladly and they don't conform to someone else's stereotypes. When we went to the Christmas craft fair in their local mall today - the one the "old timers" prefer - it was really nice to see so many people acknowledge each other by name and stop to pass the time of day. When we stopped to have lunch the same dynamic occurred - sort of like a big family reunion with everyone truly caring about what was happening in their neighbours' lives. Children were well behaved and all the adults took the time to share the parenting - the old "it takes a community to raise a child" pattern.
In contrast, the people moving into Airdrie now don't accept their obligation to participate in the social responsibilities the community expects of all adults. My sister's perception is that a lot of the new residents are individuals who think living "in the country" will solve all their problems. The truth being that often they have created the problems they are fleeing. Too many of them seem to want to blame everyone and everything else rather than be accountable for their behavior. Often their troubles are a mixture of parenting and marital issues. They just want to dump their children/problems on everyone else. They'll be running from themselves for a long time. The problem is that their selfishness causes a lot of damage in the process. The reason my sister comments about it is because of the change in the culture of the schools that her three sons attend. A lot of defiant, bullying behavior from both children and their parents. Got to feel sorry for the teachers.
My brother in law has a heart of gold, but the practicality of an eight year old sometimes. That would be fine, except that he has also sustained such severe injuries in his work that he has now spent over a year going through surgery and rehabilitation with no end in sight for a while. Big dreams are important but there have to be practical steps taken and sufficient resources available to achieve them. With him being injured, those just aren't available right now. The end result is that my sister has to work extra hard just to hold the family together. No matter how hard she tries it's one step forward, two steps back. She has my respect and my sympathy. In many ways, the practical issues she has to deal with are similar to ones my ex used to create as he fed his addictions, so even though the reasons/intentions are different, I have to work hard not to project my feelings about that onto her hubby. We've talked about her alternatives a number of times, but for her the Ann Landers test (are you better off with or without them) still keeps her trying to make her marriage work. I hope she succeeds.
Anyway, all things considered, it was nice to spend a day with them.
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